Jumpin' Jalopy!

or 'The Trouble With Tauri'

So I ask you... if... if... IF you just had your car at the shop, right?  So like, your car is all old and stuff.  I mean, it doesn't look like a total hunk of crap, but it's no spring chicken, okay?  And like, okay, you need to um, be responsible and be like totally in charge of getting some dear friends safely to a primo awesome, superbly planned, wicked exciting, much-needed 36-hour shopping and goss getaway that's in a luxury palace hotel, okay?  So, yeah, your'e all totally stoked and have been making schematics in your head on how all of you can hit all your fave shopping hotspots within the allotted time, okay, and also reserve the evening for like, sitting in the hotel and and pretending we're all rich and stuff and like, we OWN the hotel collectively, because we're business executive jetsetters with bottomless trust funds and we never lose sleep over cash and we wear fancy hats and shoes and rings all the time, and pay people to train our dogs and make our dinners and weed our gardens, and we have jobs but we don't really have to work, we just own stuff and it gets us rich and we just travel to our hotels that we OWN, right, and we get free drinks delivered to our rooms and stuff and people know who we are and are in awe of us but don't bug us for money or anything, and we get together and just laugh and laugh and revel in our success and free-will to travel about and lounge and shop, okay?  So like, you NEED to get your friends there safely and stuff, and so you totally are like 'okay, my brakes are super bad.  They have sucked for like, months, seriouslyomgorly. Orly?  Orly!  So like, this is totally the time to get them all replaced and stuff' to yourself.  So like, you do, right?  You totally bite the bullet and tell yourself 'I shoulda done it way away way long time ago.  Yeah.'  And so you like, do.  And then you pick up your car and drive it home after work and are all smug in your properly-working car, right?  And every other car you drive past for those 3 blocks, you're sneering and laughing behind the lenses of your super rad sunglasses at all the other cars thinking 'Ha!  I'm mega-responsible, right?  RIGHT?  My brakes are SO brander newer than YOURS are right now!  HA and HA.'  And then you get home and you're like all 'Aaaah.. I can relax in my responsibilitiness right now.  Yup'  And then you drink wine and stuff and go to bed, and then get up and get ready for work and wish you didn't drink that wine, and feed the dog and go out the door and get in your car for work, right?  And then you like, turn the key, or whatever, adn like........   FRICKWHATWHOTHOWINTHESAMHILLWTFISMYCARTOTALLYNOTWORKINGRIGHTNOW

ANDJUSTMAKINGCLICKINGNOISESANDWHOSHOULDIKILLABOUTTHISOKAY???

So, I ask you..... did I like, TOTALLY make the wrong move when the first thing I did was march right back into the house and like, call the shop that my car was at yesterday and like ask the dude 'hey, DUDE?  Did you totally knock some crap loose in my car, because it's totally not working today.'  Because he, like, totally didn't think I had the right to ask him that. 

Totally.

~Sarah